I’ve lost my purpose and went seeking it again, undeterred.
I’ve had tearful talks with a friend, sure my marriage was over.
I’ve chosen my husband again and again. And again.
I’ve contemplated suicide. And decided against it.
I’ve embraced therapy.
I’ve denied the inevitable.
I’ve tried running and found it exhausting. I’ve tried CrossFit and found it exhilarating.
I’ve found candles and crystals to help guide my way.
I’ve had reiki, massage (once from a small man with a large hard-on), facials, manicures, pedicures, acupuncture, and a naturopathic consultation.
I’ve tiptoed into the world of spirituality and renamed Jesus ‘The Universe’ to make amends with my childhood self.
I’ve done juice cleanses – not successful – and a 14-day colon cleanse from a box – highly successful.
I have actively sought healing, scrubbing away the layers to rediscover what’s been neglected.
I’ve learned food is not life’s only source of pleasure, though I’ve treated it as such for three decades.
I’ve rediscovered my vagina. (Oh, hello there! Fancy meeting you here!)
I’ve gone to three countries, traveling by plane, taxi, train, coach, Town Car, subway, segway, boat, and MegaBus.
I’ve fallen in love with a street dog named Flipper.
I’ve touched a dancing elephant and charmed a beach cow.
I’ve played Pied Piper to a naked band of gypsy children.
I’ve learned to be truly present.
I’ve made new friends.
I’ve kept the old.
I’ve wiped tears from my best friend, the bride, on her wedding day.
I’ve watched her hop-dance, broken-ankled, with her groom, and been gobsmacked by joy.
I’ve made plans.
I’ve ignored them.
I’ve taken time off. Truly, off.
I’ve seen love win.
I’ve traveled for my truth and found it waiting for me, at home.
In the yard, around the corner, and in the everyday.
Within.

I wrote this little ditty while reflecting on what I’ve learned in 2012, and shared it with Haunani during our business retreat. She cried. I cried. And I thought, “Hey, I’ll bet people could use this.” I’m not perfect, my inner work this year is a lot tougher than my writing work, and we’ve all got our shit. ( Sometimes it’s nice to be reminded.)

In shifting priorities and really examining what I want to keep and what I want to change in the coming year, the matter of Lux Undercover came up.

Some of you have asked the (very fair) question: if Lux is so great, why retire it?

It’s like those gorgeous wedding gifts you keep in the box. They’re fantastic, but you don’t actually use silver-plated cherub candlesticks on a day-to-day basis.

Or those portraits you don’t want to take, but you do because your friend begs. They’re of the utmost quality, and perfectly lovely, but they just don’t light you up.

Or the extra boxes in the spare room that you want to make into your office. Step one: clear the boxes. Nothing new can come into a crowded space without something old leaving, unless you want to end up on Hoarders.

Sometimes you’ve got to clean up.  Both Alicia and I are making space for what’s to come. We’ve talked at great length about how genius Lux is, how much we enjoyed creating it, and how much it’s helped those who have purchased it.

We still love Lux Undercover. And yet. It’s got to go.

We can’t go around advising you to take stock of your business and eliminate what doesn’t light you up if we don’t do the same thing ourselves – what kind of teachers, helpers, healers, or guides would that make us?

If having a portrait photography business lights you up, Lux Undercover will take you on a journey to more pleasure, more profit, and more quality in your day-to-day business offerings.

It is an absolutely stellar journey to the heart of what it means to take care of people with your business, and it’s only on sale until August 31st.

Learn more about Lux Undercover here, and as always – if you dig this post, please don’t hesitate to share it on the Facebooks.

In the comments, I would love to hear what you’ve been learning lately.  Doesn’t have to be business-related, I just find it helps to say the big lessons out loud.