Except…except you have blog envy.  You keep seeing the ProPhoto theme around, and you keep wishing you could giant images AND a sidebar AND custom flash galleries AND be able to pop all the images you’ve just processed into a post by hitting a single button.  Look no further, peeps.

ProPhoto 3, the latest evolution of the ProPhoto WordPress template, is packed with fabulous features I didn’t even know I wanted and soon couldn’t live without.  The templates look fabulous right out of the box, and it’s easier than ever to link your Twitter, Facebook, RSS feed, and bio page together in merry harmony.  (Click the ‘about’ link at the top of the blog to see how quickly and seamlessly your bio information loads.)

It’s also easier than ever to populate a blogsite with the option of featured galleries for those too lazy to click off your blog to view your work. (See my own blog, here, and click on galleries for an example.)

Likewise, those sweet little tabs that live on the left of this blog, even when you scroll down?  They’re called drawers, and they’re my favorite new feature.  On this blog, they pimp Facebook and sell the Projection & Sales Merit Badge.  On your blog, they could book a wedding or send you an e-mail or link to your favorite local businesses.

For those who are scared of customizing a WordPress theme (and yes, I’ve gotten e-mails admitting to the fear), I say: it’s easy.  Really.  Jared provides video tutorials for every major step in the process.  When I had a question, I e-mailed tech support and got an answer within a few hours.  If you’re really scared, you can purchase ‘Handheld Installation’ for $80 and have the icky technical portion of your blog-making taken care of lickety-split.

I’m not here to brag, though.  I’m here to share the WordPress-themed goodness with all of you lovely people.  So, use code

BNDCMP717

to score $10 off the latest ProPhoto theme ($199 new, $89 to upgrade from a prior ProPhoto theme).  This theme’s ease of use, vast tutorial knowledge base, quick support responses and innovative features make purchasing a no-brainer.

(If you’re ready to buy, click here, as the ‘buy now’ page is rather hard to find.)

Want to read it on the blog? HOW TO FAKE A CUSTOM BLOG

You also know that I blog on Tuesdays and Thursdays – but what if inspiration strikes on Monday? Or Friday?  Do I just table the idea until one of the blogging days?

Nope.  I use the best-kept secret in WordPress.  In your WordPress dashboard, where you normally go to hit ‘Publish,’ click on the ‘Edit’ link beside ‘Publish immediately.’  Fill in the date and time you’d like WordPress to take care of your publishing, and voila!

See that?  I wrote this post yesterday. (I am a ninja!  Heeiiiii-yah!)

Spreading your client sneak peeks out over two days brings you twice the traffic, but you can blog ‘em in one sitting.  Heck, you can blog a month at a time, if you’d like! No more excuses for neglected blogs!

Want to read it on the blog? THE BEST KEPT SECRET OF WORDPRESS

There are a number of ways to market yourself that cost a great deal of money.  Take out a full page ad in a magazine.  Put up a billboard. Send out a few thousand postcards.  (Be warned, though: if I receive 4 postcards a week from your company, I will actively seek out ways to STOP using your services.)

If you’d rather go with the free route, read on:

1.)  Go to the library, already.

You may not have set foot in a library since the 3rd grade during StoryTime with Mrs. Hossenfeffer.  That’s no excuse — get off your tushie, get your totally free library card, and check out three books about business and/or marketing.

2.) Read the library books.

Yes, I know you believe in The Secret to attract all that is good and awesome to you, but it’s much faster to just read your library books.  Take notes, bust out your highlighter, and get inspired.

3.) Make a plan.

You’ve read the books.  Now, get out your calendar.  (Or even a piece of paper with a grid on it.)  Make a 3-3-3 plan: three tasks you can complete this week, three tasks you’ll complete this month, and three tasks you’ll complete this year that will help to market your business.

From cross promotions with fabulous entrepreneurs to having coffee with former clients for feedback, making a plan and creating action items will keep you accountable for your DIY Marketing World Takeover.

4.) Update your blog.

Blogs are driven by relevant content that keeps your business fresh and alive to clients.  I don’t care if you’re writing about ways to pick a daycare provider or how to get grass stains out of your jeans — write. Show us pretty pictures, create a Top 10 List, let your secret talent loose on YouTube — but post regularly.  Please.

Again, it may help to create a schedule here.  (You can even be sneaky and schedule blog posts for when  you’re not around, thus banging out an entire month’s worth of content in one go!  Neat, huh?)

5.) Stalk Seth Godin.

Okay, maybe not stalk, but pay attention to him.  Read his blog posts, and consider how you can apply ‘em to your own circumstances.  When it comes to marketing, his ideas are fresh and relevant.

6.) Do good.

Find a way to link yourself with a cause you’re passionate about, whether by helping to plan an event or by creating a gangbusters-superfab promo designed to raise money for your cause.  Reading ‘Love is the Killer App‘ by Tim Sanders will lead to more of this behavior, I promise…

7.) Be generous.

Share your resources with others who are in the same boat — if your blog gets seven times the traffic of the Myspace page of that local songwriter you love, why not offer ‘em an interview and a plug for their latest gig?  You never know the ways this behavior could come back to reward you, and it’s an easy way to keep updating your blog.

8.) Facebook, Twitter, Digg, StumbleUpon, Mashable, Squidoo, Tumblr..embrace some form of Web 2.0.

If you’re faced with free time, why not make the most of it?  The party’s online, and it’s free to join.  Explore the world of social media, and join the conversation.

Please note: I said conversation, not popping on to tweet about your business and then disappearing into greener pastures.  Meaningful relationships and events take time & effort, but can yield unexpectedly fabulous dividends.

9.) Launch a new product.

If no one’s paying attention to your old products, perhaps it’s time to launch a new one.  Maybe it’s a mixed media presentation of your work, a gallery show, a new iteration of a prior bestseller, or a bona fide product that comes in the mail.  Product excitement leads to more people exploring your online presence and quite possibly putting $ in your (no-longer-languishing) bank account.

10.) Don’t forget to return your library books.  Those late fees really add up.

Want to read it on the blog? DIY MARKETING.